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Writer's pictureAlexis Lion

Understanding the Concept of Limited Re-parenting

An important process in Schema Therapy which sets itself apart from other psychotherapy models, it fulfils clients' unmet core emotional needs. Therapists will not only provide attunement and warmth to clients but also emphatically confront clients' unhealthy behaviours and inter-personal communication within therapy. 


When the client as a child endured emotional and verbal abuse from their primary caregivers, what they usually need in therapy as adults is nurturance, affirmation and guidance. As a Schema Therapy practitioner, I would often be assertive yet gentle with such clients, “I hear that you feel really enraged. So much anger towards her! Argh! It is okay to be so mad! Let’s take a pause. Do you remember the last time we talked about not breaking furniture whenever the Enraged Child takes over? What did we discuss we should do instead?”



In a different situation as a child, the client suffered from emotional neglect from those that they trust and care about, what their emotional needs are typically is nurturance, protection and play. 

Client may say, “I tried my best at work by giving long hours, but it’s just not enough. I feel empty.” In therapy, I may respond, “You tried so hard, Anna (not real name). I see that you have given all that you have. Where’s the part of Anna that wants to have fun and just enjoy? I think that side of her needs to be heard too.”


The ongoing process of “Limited Reparenting” strengthens the client's sense of self, or Healthy Adult schema mode. It also promotes healing of their inner child, or Vulnerable Child mode. As therapy progressed, clients start internalising their therapist's role and presence in their daily lives.


Evidence has shown that clients would continue to heal their schemas and schema modes on their own even when therapy has reached an ending.



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